When UST Is Too Much
by queenofthelooneybin
Summary: The fangirls from 'Teaching Kevin Lynch' return to solve the problem of JJ leaving and the Hotch/Emily UST.


Note: This will be my last post for a while. I broke my wrist running last week and will need to take a break for a while. This little piece is being typed by a friend.

I'M ENGAGED! YAY! Seriously. I am. Yay me!

A refresher on the fangirls:

Q- queenofthelooneybin. The leader of the group.

The Geek- geekroyalty. Second in command.

Pinky- Formerly Emily. Name changed to avoid confusion. The only sane member.

Corny- Q's fiancé. Not a fanboy.

Reid's rant was lifted from wikipedia

Sorry if it's random, but had to be done

Xxx

**When UST Is Too Much**

Sometimes, Pinky wondered why she even bothered to be the voice of reason. Her sister and friend were too far gone, sanity wise. And Corny was so in love with Q that he was willing to dive into the TV for her. Q would need assistance for the next few weeks, due to an broken wrist.

Today, they were going into the CM universe again. After fixing the Kevin Lynch Problem, they had been sated for a while. Then, Q and The Geek had found more things to be upset with. One was the UST between Emily and Hotch. The other was JJ leaving. That particular episode had made Q throw a bowl of popcorn at the TV. The bowl had disappeared into said appliance and had never been seen again. Ever since their last journey, the TV had been a portal to whatever fandom was playing on the TV. To get people into the fictional universe. there was a potion: cooked chicken flavored ramen noodles,(beef sent them to Harry Potter Puppet Pals universe) a packet of chili powder and a pinch of sugar. They had bottles of the stuff by now.

"Okay. We're ready," Pinky said and threw a bottle's contents at the TV. She dove in first, followed by Q, Corny and The Geek. 

Xxx

It was a normal day at the BAU. Hotch was standing at his office door, angsting over the woman he loved: Emily Prentiss. Rossi was somewhere and the rest were listening to Reid ramble about Starbucks.

"From Starbucks' founding in later forms in Seattle as a local coffee bean roaster and retailer, the company has expanded rapidly. In the 1990s, Starbucks was opening a new store every workday, a pace that continued into the 2000s. The first store outside the United States or Canada opened in the mid-'90s, and overseas stores now constitute almost one third of Starbucks' stores. The company planned to open a net of 900 new stores outside of the United States in 2009, but has announced 900 store closures in the United States since has been a target of protests on issues such as fair-trade policies, labor relations, environmental impact, political views, and anti-competitive practices-"

Reid was cut off by a flash and boom. Four people fell from the ceiling: three females and a male. Two of the women jumped on Reid, nearly crushing him to death.

"Spencer, we love you!" one of them squealed.

The youngest of the group turned to the male. "How are you not bothered by your fiancée on top of another man?"

"She's a fangirl," the man answered calmly.

"Who are you people?" Morgan asked.

"I am Q and they are Corny, Pinky and The Geek. We are here to help," one of the squealing girls said.

"Help with what?" Emily asked.

"JJ and the Hotch/Emily UST," The Geek said cheerfully.

"What does UST mean?" Emily asked.

"Unresolved sexual tension," Reid piped up.

"There's no...I mean...no!" Emily was now tomato red.

"Liar, liar, pants on fire," The Geek chanted.

Q went to Hotch's office and dragged him out. The Geek grabbed Emily and soon they were at a closet. Both were tossed in.

"And stay there until I hear some moaning!" Q yelled.

Pinky pulled a bat from The Back Pocket Of Infinite Holding and went upstairs, a scary gleam in her eye. No one dared to follow. They heard screams, glass breaking and a coo moo before Pinky came back, calm as ever.

"She'll be back Thursday," she said in her usual monotone and proceeded to eat a Twinkee.

17 hours later…

Everyone was dying of boredom. Q had fallen asleep, Pinky was eating a cake she had pulled from her pocket, Reid was pacing, Corny had gone to get some pizza and the agents were doing paperwork.

And then…

A moan, a giggle, a whisper.

"SUCCESS!" The Geek screamed and woke up Q to give her a high-five. "Our work here is done!"

Pinky produced a bottle of their portal potion, threw it and then they were gone.


End file.
